MISVERSTANDEN EN VOOROORDELEN RONDOM NON-MONOGAMIE
Lisa Evelyn onderhoudt een bijzondere blog, waarin ze een lans breekt voor een controversiële relatievorm: polyamorie. Zo controversieel zelfs dat de spellingscontrole van de LOVER-redacteur van dienst het woord polyamorie niet eens herkent. Vaste LOVER-lezers zullen het begrip waarschijnlijk wél herkennen, LOVER wijdt immers vaker artikelen aan alternatieve relatievormen, waaronder ook polyamorie (zie ook ‘Non-monogamy – Common Misconceptions part 1’ staat vandaag centraal in LOVER’s Uitgelicht. En ter verdere lering en vermaak: bekijk vooral ook even de zeer informatieve non-monogame-relatiemap die onder onderstaand citaat staat.
‘That said, I will probably argue for the cause of non-monogamy as a general concept. And although it’s hard to separate it sometimes, try and understand that it is not aimed at you personally. Saying that humans might not be ‘naturally’ monogamous is not a stab at your lifestyle (neither is it a justification of lying and cheating, see part 2), it is a way to establish non-monogamy as a possible choice. Not replacing monogamy, but adding to it. I was well in my twenties when I really learned about non-monogamy, and I’m not humble enough to pretend that I’m an under-educated lady. I knew of open relationships (as a thing only some outsiders did) and polygyny (one man having multiple wives – something that isn’t very attractive to someone who feels such freedom should be equal). I díd notice a distinct lack of jealousy in my own feelings toward partners (at least, compared to the accepted standard), and yet, it took me years to figure out I even had a choice. If I had only known earlier what options exist, and how many people are choosing these options and living happy lives… if I had understood that jealousy is not necessarily required for love, if I hadn’t been subjected to an ongoing stream of popular culture depicting monogamy as the only serious relationship-option… (bonus points if it’s ’till death do us part’!)’ – Lisa Evelyn
